Deodorant
Hi Eileen, how's it going?
Hello Scimon. I'm doing great these days, especially since my conversion to Sciencism. It's great to know that Science is guiding me through life.
I'm so glad that it's working out for you. I was just buying some chewing gum. So what brings you to the store?
Ah! Thanks for reminding me about the chewing gum! Well I came here mainly to buy some deodorant. Perhaps you could help me. Which of these two scents do you like?
Hmm. Well as a Sciencist, I feel that I should tell you what the Scible says on the subject first.
Oh? I didn't realize that the Scible had anything to say about deodorant!
That's perfectly understandable, seeing as how you couldn't have read much of it in this short time. In fact, it has a section on hygiene. The Scible recommends against using perfumed deodorants or anti-perspirants. The preferred deodorant to use is an alum crystal.
A what? Never heard of it.
Well I'm not surprised. Modern society has been seduced by profiteering perfume companies into constantly wearing harmful chemicals on our skin. Crystal alum is available in some shops that specialize in natural products.
I see. This is all very interesting. And how does this crystal alum work?
The exact nature and working of crystal alum is a fairly high-Level topic. Suffice to say that crystal alum has been used since ancient times, when Science revealed it to ancient people. It is completely odourless and kills bacteria. One application is sufficient to last several days.
Really? Wow!
It is very convenient to use too. It is applied directly to skin under the arms and anywhere else immediately after showering. There is generally no need to reapply until the next shower.
That's great! One less thing to carry in my handbag!
Also, unlike anti-perspirants, crystal alum does not interfere with the natural sweating function of our bodies. Science created our bodies in this way for a reason, and so we should not interfere unnecessarily with the natural processes of our bodies.
Oh, I see. I didn't know that sweating served a useful purpose.
It does, however the exact details are high-Level. You can know these things when you are ready, if you so wish. Oh, and a block of crystal alum can last more than a year.
A whole year! Just think of all the money I'd save!
If you were so inclined, you could even donate that extra money to a Sciencism-approved charity. These charities' dealings are entirely transparent and are audited regularly so you know that your money is being put to good use. Science would bestow upon you innumerable blessings.
Yes! There are so many disadvantaged children in this world. I would be happy to help give them a chance at leading a happy life. But tell me, are there any cons in using this crystal alum?
Yes there is one thing. Avoid dropping the crystal alum because it will break if it is dropped on a hard surface.
Oh is that all! I was expecting there to be some catch like cancer or something. Anyway, I'm usually very careful when handling things.
Cancer? Ha ha. No, not at all. It has been used safely for thousands of years. In fact, use the harmful chemical soup that's sold as deodorant these days and cancer would be the least of your worries. You see, Science wants us to lead a more natural life. Wearing artificial perfumes on our skin masks the natural pheromones that are produced by our skin, thus leading to negative consequences such as poor mate selection, which can be disastrous for families with children.
You're right. The poor children! People these days are so sex-addled that they think only of themselves and their hedonistic pleasures.
True. Anyway, I will let you get back to your shopping. Feel free to ask me should you need any advice.
Thank you Scimon. See you around! Science be with you.
Science be with you.
